Woman attempts gratitude & why Saudi women don’t drive

Today I decided that I’d do that grateful thing.

You know where you wake up and think of what you’re grateful for rather than wake up and confirm why life is a pile of poop.

I walk every day (yep, you heard me, every day – sometimes its just a hungover stumble to the coffee shop and then 5 minutes around the block, but the day starts off with a walk none the less)

So I figure I can be grateful everyday – maybe not for everything – but I can select a few things to be grateful for every day.

So here goes. Grateful things.

Ok so the first ones should be the easiest I guess. Um, I am grateful for audible.com! Wow that was easy! Yes, I love audible, I listen to my books when I’m walking – the Amanda Palmer book the art of asking was /is possibly the best produced audio book that I’ve ever heard. She’s cheating somewhat tough because she can sing and…well, not everyone can hold a tune so its not overly fair to mere mortals who can’t even him or whistle.

I am grateful for the iphone on which I listen to the audio books – obviously I have to give a shout out to the phone – because the portable telephone is indeed the most magical device of our times.

How many movies has Kevin Bacon been in? boom – just ask Siri. She knows (or in my case, he knows,) yes, in case you didn’t know you can change siri to a man and change his accent to boot – so I have a male Australian siri, which is kinda hot, but I swear he’s lazier than the normal siri. He often says, sorry hotcakes, I can’t do that right now.

Now did you know you can get your phone to call you whatever you want? Just hold down the siri button and ask siri “whats my name?” siri will tell you and then you can say “siri, I want you to call me…(insert dream name of your choice here” gorgeous lady, lady gaga, lady vagina – whatever tickles your fancy really)

So whilst we’re going down this road I guess I’m grateful for podcasts. “You made it weird” “Sex with Emily” (to be fair I’ve only listened to one episode, but thus farhave learnt some intriguing and possibly useful info – ladies google: ohmibod.com DO IT)

Oh and I’m grateful for Tim Ferris, despite the fact that on the whole, his show is a total rich dude fest. Like, ‘dude, you’re great, no dude you’re great and we’re all so damn rich isn’t this great?’ apart from that shizzle, he’s got some interesting top tips.

I’m also glad I can drive! I have been known to scare some people with my driving but technically I can drive so I’m glad I don’t live in Saudi where I can’t drive. I did ask a local recently if he thought it was fair that Saudi women can’t drive. And he assured me that it was for the best…“most of them are drunk half the time, so its probably safer that they don’t drive”

So that makes me happy! Instead of feeling sad that Saudi women are repressed and aren’t allowed to drive I shall now go around thinking that they’re all just having a jolly nice time and having a few drinks with their girlfriends and simply can’t drive home because they’re waaaaay too intoxicated.

Oh and while we’re at it – maybe I shall start looking at the Burka as a good thing as well.

Picture this – you’ve got a massive pimple on your chin, you just cant be arsed getting your eyebrows (and possibly lady moustache?) waxed so you pop on a full face Burka and voila! You’re ready to hit the road. No fuss no muss.

So today I’m also grateful for Burkas. Maybe this gratitude thing isn’t as hard as I thought it would be.

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Zoom in to middle woman, she totally busted me taking this shot.

 

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This entry was posted on February 17, 2016 by in OPINION and tagged , , , , , .

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